Criticising the show brought one expected reaction: MLP devotees thought I was unreasonably negative and dismissive of the show's qualities. But the fact is, I had a blast: the show is charming. Plus I was drunk.
In that spirit, I am proud to present the Official [adjective][species] My Little Pony Cocktail: Vodka is Magic. (Alternate subtitle: The Party Cannon.)
It's bright pink, sweet without being saccharine, and will put you at peace with the world. This recipe is enough to get one person very drunk.
500 mL (about 15 fl oz) beetroot-infused vodka
100 mL (3 fl oz) sweet white vermouth, perhaps Martini Bianco
juice and peel of 1/2 lemon
1 tablespoon sugar
Directions: Shake over lots of ice until the sugar has dissolved. Strain out the lemon peel and serve, perhaps with another block of ice. Commence MLP:FiM viewing marathon.
You'll need to make your own beetroot vodka. It's easy, and thrifty: the infusion process will mellow cheap vodka into something perfectly drinkable.
First, cook one medium beetroot: the easiest way is to wrap a raw beetroot in aluminium foil and pop it into a moderate oven (160 °C / 320 °F) for an hour or two, until it's tender (timing isn't critical). Slip the skin off under cold running water.
You may be able to buy pre-cooked beetroot, sometimes sold in vacuum packs. Do not use pickled beetroot from a tin. That would be bad.
Slice your beetroot, add it to a bowl or a jar, and pour your vodka over the top. Cover it with an airtight lid (cling film is fine). Leave it to infuse at room temperature for a couple of days. Again, timing isn't critical: anything from a few hours to a week will be fine.
Vodka is Magic will announce itself with an incongruous whiff of beetroot, and a bracingly strong first sip. From there, it's warming and comforting.
You might serve Vodka is Magic in a martini glass, but it's not a martini. It's more a sister drink to the Cosmopolitan, stronger and less sour but equally appropriate for time spent in the company of pastel equines with ludicrous manes.